| A little boy wanted $100 badly
and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened.
Then he decided to write GOD a letter
requesting the $100. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed
to GOD USA, they decided to send it to President Clinton.
The President was so impressed,
touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little
boy a $5.00 bill.
President Clinton thought this would
appear to be a lot of money to a little boy. The little boy was delighted
with the $5.00 and sat down to write a thank you note to GOD, which read:
Dear GOD,
Thank you very much for sending the money but, I noticed
that for some reason you had to send it through Washington
D.C. and, as usual, those jerks deducted $95.00..
A magician worked on a cruise ship.
Since the audience was different each week, he did the same tricks over
and over again. One problem: The captain's parrot saw the shows each week
and began to understand how the magician did every trick. Once the parrot
understood, she started shouting in the middle of the show: "Look, it's
not the same hat! Look, he's hiding the flowers under the table. Hey, why
are all the cards the ace of spades?"
The magician was furious but couldn't
do anything. It was, after all, the captain's parrot. Then the ship sank.
After swimming for a few hours, the magician found himself on a piece of
wood floating in the middle of the sea with, as fate would have it, the
parrot. They stared malevolently at each other but did not utter a word.
This went on for a day and then another, and then another.
Finally on the fourth day, the parrot
could restrain itself no longer: "OK," she said, "I give up. What'd you
do with the ship?" |
| When do bears emerge from hibernation?
Some trivia books still try to pose
this as a trick question, stating that bears don't emerge because they
never hibernated in the first place. The bear's body temperature doesn't
fall as much as that of other hibernating animals, and this was once thought
to disqualify them as true hibernators. But now we know that their
higher body temperature is simply a function of their larger size.
Like other hibernators, bears don't
sleep through the winter, but rather wake up periodically and eat
what they've stored in their cave. They emerge for good when average temperatures
are above freezing.
How does the bear determine the
average temperature? Damned if I know. I'm more interested in how we knew
about the bear's hibernating temperature in the first place. Would you
enter the cave of a sleeping bear and stick a thermometer… well,
wherever? |
